Below The Surface

I think one of the reasons self-hatred is so sneaky is because it’s not something that the ego will allow. Or, if it does allow it certainly won’t allow you to consciously acknowledge it.
 
My childhood and adolescence was very disempowering. I was given no scaffolding to grow. I was taught that my feelings didn’t matter and that I wasn’t capable of having an opinion.
 
While I didn’t really think that I believed these things as an adult my behaviors and boundaries have told a different story.
 
Sitting quietly. Allowing my mind to explore and acknowledge some bad decisions I’ve made that I knew would cost me peace and physical health has been very empowering and transformative.
 
In these times of meditation I’ve been able to go below the surface of my loudest thoughts and beliefs into the deeper places that are harder to sound. Places in my mind that are like long abandoned, dusty, ancient libraries. This exploration is like walking into a room where no one has been in millenia. It has a stillness that is unfamiliar. It feels profound. It stirs a curiosity as to why it’s so unvisited. And, therein lies a powerful truth. Noise. Loudness. Disruption. Turmoil. Discord. Those are the things that get attention. And why is that? We are wired for self-preservation. Whenever anything threatening comes up that is where all of our focus goes. Unfortunately, our modern lives operate on the premise of scarcity even though we are surrounded by abundance. More is always being required of us. More hours at work. More patience because someone or something is always trying us. And, we find ourselves in a rhythm where we exist in operating in the loud areas of our minds.
 
Yet there is better for us. There is a richness we are sacrificing. There is wisdom and love and understanding that we are exchanging for desperation and fight or flight. We are pushed to perform everyday of our lives and the concept of just “being” is becoming more foreign by the day.
 
I am determined to spend more time in this transcendent and quiet place where there are messages of empowerment. I’m tapping into a confidence in my long neglected inner compass. I’m positioned to honor my intuition. I’m becoming comfortable enforcing my boundaries. I’m feeling hopeful and eager and optimistic about uncovering the hidden aspects of me and all the ways I’m going to be strengthened by these discoveriesThe mind

 

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Published by cozettdunn

Value is something that is ascribed. It's scalable. It's leverageable. It's changeable. It can be held personally or collectively. It can be determined personally or collectively. What's so striking about someone or something of value is that its worth often isn't realized until it becomes scarce. I've said it before and I'm saying it again, "your presence comes at a premium." You are NOT an inexhaustible resource. The energy you give to others....is like fossil fuel. It isn't evergreen. It takes time to form & life in the body is short. This is why it's so important to form relationships where met needs are a regular reality. If there was one thing I could change about my past it would be to stop relationships that were draining my energy, disrespecting my time, and were characterized by apathy when it came to my most basic needs. Recognizing energy drains can be tricky because they often involve codependent relationships. If someone or something external to yourself has more power to determine the state of your mental or physical health that is a clear indicator that adjustments need to be made. Sovereignty has been an important theme for me over the last several years. The ability to be self-determining, self-governing, self-sustaining and self-loving have been huge areas of energy leaks for me. I spent an entire lifetime giving away my personal power in hopes of: 1. Being chosen 2. Being protected 3. Being safe 4. Being respected 5. Being supported I don't think I need to tell you what kind of road this led me down. I received none of the above. I felt depleted, looked over, taken for granted, robbed (literally) & left out in the cold. The lessons I've learned since then are ones that I've been able to apply broadly. They've become practiced skills that I've used in personal, professional, and global arenas. The lessons and wisdom have brought me into an expansiveness within my humanity that I believe can be catalystic for others. Here's what I can do: 1. Help you identify obscured energy leaks 2. Lead you through self-reflection in ways that bypass your conscious mind so that you get the answers you need from the root of your inner wisdom 3. Model for you methods of introspection that can be as gentle or as intense as you need 4. Help you identify the difference between healthy oscillations of resolve versus self-sabotage 5. Help you overcome imposter syndrome 6. Lead you through conversational techniques that will enhance and improve your emotional dexterity 7. Craft personalized meditations, mantras, and soul journeys where you can learn to lead yourself into personal power and autonomy 8. Help you script write yourself into the version of you that you're longing to be 9. Offer deep listening and help you tap into the power of solitude even if you're afraid of stillness 10. Utilize my own unique spiritual gifts to give you insight into the answers you've been searching for....perhaps all your life. As a trauma survivor turned life coach I can help you on your journey to navigate to the next highest version of yourself. Unless someone has walked a mile in your shoes they just don't get it. If you're looking for someone to come alongside you who does get it let's connect.

Spiritual Truths

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