Category: Healthy Living

Cozett Contemplates Being A Healer

You used to be so nice~ It was because I was afraid of the implications of displeasing you.

You’re so strong & such an inspiration ~ It’s because of my survival instinct and because I’m naturally a good person

You’re so brave~ My nervous system would no longer allow me to tolerate the confines of the box people wanted me in. It was either tear it apart or continue to betray my emotional well-being

You must be an empath~ I’m hypervigiliant. I’m highly attuned to the energy of others because I was traumatized as a child.

As a trauma survivor you find yourself on a continuum. There is a linear space, thread, that runs from your childhood, into your present, and reaches out before you in the time to come. Like a train track you can stand on any point of it and feel the vibration of the train whether its behind you or has passed you. It doesn’t matter if you can see it. You can still feel it its vibration. Its energy.

As if in a dream, you find yourself experiencing an alternate reality than that of those around you, and you’re constantly teaching yourself what’s real and what’s not, what to hang on to, and what to let go of.

People who have experienced emotional trauma have brain changes, similar to those who have had concussions.

Emotions, feelings, are so powerful they can physically reshape the structure of your brain and thereby color your reality. Thankfully, neuroplasticity is a thing. But, healing is something that needs support and takes work. And while the trauma isn’t your fault you are the one who will have to take the responsibility to heal what you didn’t harm. That feels unfair and is traumatic in its own sense.

This is why its imperative…..to not feel like you have to be nice to everyone. Because everyone….isn’t supporting the healing of your brain and nervous system. Everyone isn’t guarding your heart and prioritizing your well-being or creating safe spaces for you or trying to understand the decisions you make.

In fact, most people aren’t critical thinkers. For many it’s never occurred to them how they could make the world a better place by looking through the lenses of others and a lot of people have zero desire to do so even if it has occurred to them. The fact is, that those with narrow emotional experience, narrowed and selective perspectives that require people to believe the way they do, behave the way they do, see the world and others the way they do creates disenfranchisement because it automatically has the implication that there are consequences for people who aren’t like them.

So here we are as trauma survivors. Healing from harm we didn’t create. Creating corners of safe space from spaces that others assume should only belong to them.

I want to take this post and tell trauma survivors how amazing, dynamic, multi-faceted, emotionally intelligent, beautiful, powerful, and expansive they are. You have amazing qualities that evolved on the inside of you. You are an evolved human being. You have space on the inside of you. That space is capacity. Capacity for good. Capacity gives you the ability to receive that narrowness cannot afford you.

I believe that humanity has begun a massive shift. A shift that values emotional intelligence and expansiveness and tolerance. A shift of conviction.

There will be a collective of humanity who deeply hold the belief that it is better to be a bridge builder for every chasm is better than clinging to feeling superior because of what “sets them apart.”

There will be a collective of…us…who deeply believe that to be a healer isn’t something relegated only to licensed professionals or the “spiritually” gifted. Healing belong to humanity. Period. It is expressed in community not division. It is given and received in relationship with those who understand that though we are many, ultimately we are one.

I refuse to be anything other than safe. I refuse to be anything other than a healer. I refuse to be anything other than whole.

And, if you’re not of this same energy you can’t be in MY energy. At all. My health cannot afford you.

The community I’m creating, the circle I’m curating, the reality I’m shaping is necessarily humane, good, sovereign.

Cozett Contemplates the conviction of what it means to be a healer

Yours in emotional intelligence,

Cozett Dunn

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The Masculine Man And My Mirage: Foundational Context For Bidirectional Learning And (hopefully) Community (Pt 1)

Man. Masculine. Mirage.

If you follow me closely enough you will be acquainted with my contemplations about life & how trauma has intricately shaped my evolution. Truly, as I write this I understand that no one can really understand…unless they can go tit for tat on the count of traumatic events that happened over the course of my life. But, what I’m writing here isn’t a peeing contest. It is however my first public post and write out loud sessions of how I will be processing a segment of my life that I wish to have a happy conclusion on before I die. An integration that leaves me satisfied.

At 44, in what is my mid-life, I realize we never stop learning of course. And, one of the things I admire about myself is that I’m adaptable. Life has taught me there is literally nothing that is set in stone. To live life with an inflexibility and disdain towards new or divergent views or information is to willfully agree to devolve, desist, subsist, and invite nothing but contrast and frustration. It is to live small and to exist within a very narrow scope. I don’t know about you but for me the thought of this makes me feel claustrophobic.

My intelligence is emotional. It is circumspect. It is agile.

From the age of 4 the big question of life has been at the forefront of my conscious awareness, “WHY?” As a trauma survivor and someone who has very unique & unusual lived experiences I’ve always wanted to know, “why?”

When it comes to God, truth, and faith I’ve been able to distill perspectives from quantum physics and cosmology to feel absolutely satisfied in my understanding about their origin (or lack thereof), nature, mechanism, purpose, and of course relativity.

Having these “figured out” now affords me the mental space to try to sift through my lived experience with men to try to understand them in spite of my negative lived experience with them and because of them. From my lived experience and my “hope springs eternal” approach to exploring what is my inescapable counter part it cannot be said that I’m not courageous. And, as a heterosexual and heteromantic woman the issue of romantic love is inseparable from my deep desire to understand the masculine amongst us. One day perhaps I will stop touching the hot, glowing, red eye of the stove. But, that day is not now.

The journey to understanding anyone or anything will always involve looking at the symbology surrounding and characterizing what or who you seek to understand as a first step onto the path. The symbology of a person, place, or thing is what comes before any verbiage is ascribed. Humans existed before language and it is because of symbolism that we gather our first bits of information to inform our instincts about what we’re learning about. Whether something is large, or small, quiet or loud, sharp or soft helps us determine how to approach our subject.

If a willing harmony and oneness can be achieved there is no doubt in my mind that the careful exploration of our symbolism is the genesis of that state.

It is at this point of genesis that I begin my personal journey in exploring, understanding, and relating to men. And, as I process, integrate, summate, and find my own conclusions I wish to make a promise to all men. My promise to you as a man, if you’re reading this, is that I will not be satisfied or tricked into holding a narrow, media swayed, post modern opinion of you. You are as ancient as I. And, I long to understand you from the beginning of time not from the middle of the feminist era. I am here to see and help you see your timeless qualities that are without reproach. I promise to be a safe place of feminine softness that is conducive and receptive and ever curious about the multi-faceted masculine that is you. Sans toxicity. I wish to separate you and perhaps take you on this journey with me to reexamine the symbolism that has been assigned to you. Maybe you can tell me at which points the symbols feel fitting or ill-fitting. Then this blog post will become a living bi-directional, learning adventure. And, who knows maybe in this way to I can create a community! The thought of this makes my heart feel full as I’m about to embark on what could be a journey of a million miles. Are you with me?

With bare feet I walk upon a new canvas and I leave behind narrative paths that do not serve our collectives

My souls and toes so sensitive to the vibration of the earth and my feminine arches serving as etheric connectives

When I meet the collective him my eager and keen intuition will open for unbound observation

The shoes I could have worn to get here would have been familiar and comfortable but would have perpetuated his obfuscation

And, I’m not interested in self-sabotage or treachery.

Many questions are building in my mind. I wonder what the image of him will make clear in me. All this before words.

In exploring your imagery throughout the history of humanity we cannot evade the primal iconography of your phallus. It has come to be defined (with words) as a symbol of power. However, it is also the regenerative part of you. It is a procreative part of you that delivers a bodily elixir of life. Without you, there would be no us. Since you are both how do you feel that the only characteristic concerning your penis that gets mentioned is “power” and not also regeneration and procreation? This reduces men to a narrow scope I believe.

Divine Masculine tell me your thoughts on the words below by Sophie Strand:

“Do we want to hand the masculine a sword of a flowering wand? The sword slices, divides, and subdues. Its tip drags imaginary borders across ecosystems. The sword does not embrace. It does not connect. It does not ask questions. It is not an instrument of intimacy. It either attacks or defends, affirming that every interaction is conflict, and every story is about domination. The sword, perfected by the Romans as the “spatha” (or short sword) for the specific task of maiming and executing prisoners, quite literally cuts the mind off from the body. The sword proposes that we can wield our intellect without our somatic intuition and without our rooted existence in ecosystems. The sword encapsulate the material reductionist idea that we can “cut” something up into discrete parts and thus understand it as a whole- that we must kill the animal to study the animal; that if we dissect enough brains, we might find the secrets of consciousness. The want on the other hand creates connections.

Some of the earliest examples of wands are the apotropaic hippopotamus tusk wands or “birth tusks” used in Middle Kingdom Egypt (1900 BCE), which were carved with lions, snakes, and frogs and used to magically protect pregnant women and children. They are thought by some to have been used specifically, to draw a circle of safety around a woman in labor. Inscriptions on these ancient wands tell us they are “the protector of night” and “the protector of day,” which may indicate a belief that they helped establish temporal order. We also have the snake staffs of Aaron and Moses in the Hebrew Bible, which were used in spiritual debate, to part the waters of the Red Sea, and to draw water from a stone. These magical staffs that flicker between the solid and the serpentine flow into the healing caduceus of Hermes, a winged wand encircled by two snakes. Rhabdomancy, or dowsing, once used forked wooden wands to magically survey the land for water, a practice that may date back nearly 8,000 years, as evidenced by art in the Saharan Tassili caves. Homer makes numerous references to magical wands in both the Iliad and the Odyssey, putting them in the hands of Circe, Athena, and Hermes. Celtic mythology also features many wands, rods, and staffs; for example, in the famous legend of Fionn MacCumhaill, the hero uses hazel wands to transform people into animals, as a divination device, and to defend himself from harm.

The wand encircles us with protection during biological rites of passage from birth to marriage to death. It draws us to water. It enchants us into closer kinship with animals and plants and landscapes by literally transforming us into them. It mends broken bodies, knits wounds, and softens minds hardened by anthropocentrism (human centric existence of all things). While swords are made only by human hands, wands, it may be argued, predate human beings themselves. All it takes is a woody shoot bursting into blossom. A cedar branch. A sprig of hawthorn. A tree erupting in lichens. For that very reason, perhaps, wands have been central to magical and ritual practices since before human history began to be recorded.” (The Flowering Wand, by Sophie Strand).

My question here is what resonates most with the masculine? The sword or the wand? The answer to that is very revealing and is worthy of sitting around a fire with.

Lots of love,

Cozett Dunn

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Sleep Trauma And Resolution: Shadow Work For The Shadowscape

Lack of sleep has been a growing crisis. Globally, since the 1970’s there has been a sharp decline in quality and duration of sleep. And, if you’re located in the U.S., the U.K., or Japan you are even less likely to be able to obtain more than 6 hours of sleep per night.

Sleep deprivation has been a factor in some of the planet’s greatest disasters. The nuclear disaster at Three Mile Island in 1979, the nuclear meltdown of Chernobyl in 1986, and the massive Exxon Valdez oil spill all had at the center of the incident…sleep deprived humans. (https://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/features/10-results-sleep-loss). So, why don’t we hear about that? There is a consensus amongst sleep scientists that citizens of capitalistic cultures are more prone to miss out on sleep due to the productivity demands of their jobs. Additionally, capitalistic cultures are known for “sleep machismo.” The old, “sleep when you’re dead” adage stems from this culture. Capitalism depends on 2 things: productivity and consumerism. When someone is sleeping…neither of those things are happening. And, so we find ourselves traumatized, and feeling guilty for this very necessary need. Now we even know that there are different sleep chronotypes and that we don’t get to choose whether we are a morning person or a night owl! So much has been discovered about the necessity, benefits, and genetic dispositions about sleep! But, it seems since most of us are sleep deprived and zombified we aren’t getting the education we need to experience better sleep. Our minds are numbed out and we are losing touch with the voice of our biological rhythms.

Because I had a childhood filled with frequent trauma, one way that my precious mamaw cared for me was by protecting my sleep. She knew if I was asleep I was healing from the stress and pain that constantly swirled around me. She knew if I was asleep, I was safe, and I was comfortable. However, all of this changed at the age of 18 for me. I graduated high school and moved to a larger city where I met my now, ex-husband. In retrospect I now understand that he was the morning person chronotype. But, for seventeen years I was railed at because I couldn’t get up early and hold an 8 am to 5 pm job. He constantly berated me and called me lazy even though I could wake up and work 12 pm to 12 am and essentially put in more hours than he did. Because I couldn’t wake when he did he felt I lacked ambition and motivation and wasn’t pulling my weight for our financial well-being. I want to note here that it was me, all on my own, who bought our first house, it was me who paid off his truck early, it was me who worked a full-time job, a side job, and did public speaking twice a week. All of this was simply because I couldn’t wake up early and he could.

I thought perhaps once I left him that I would finally be able to sleep without fear of being berated or criticized. But, after seventeen years a neural circuit had definitely formed. As I write this I’m struggling with the idea of going to bed (I left him 7 years ago and I’m still struggling with fear). I’ve been in therapy and doing neural integration for 5 years now and I’ve healed so much more than I ever thought I could. And now I’m finally to a place where I can focus on my sleep.

As my mind has pondered going to bed I’ve noticed a pattern with myself. I always feel this last minute “push” of sorts to work and not allow myself to get drowsy when it comes time for bed. So tonight I’ve decided to sit with the feeling rather and ask it questions rather than get up and go on a cleaning spree or “crank out” content. This is content I guess, but it’s also a journal entry, a therapeutic release that I hope will help me…go to bed and fall asleep.

As I’ve focused on this feeling of doing trying to push myself when it gets bedtime I’ve been able to hone in on the specific motivation behind the feeling and that is the motivation to feel…resolve. I need to feel I’ve resolved problems before I allow myself to get totally still. I find myself thinking, “there’s at least one more thing I need to do or think through before I call it a day.” Yet I lie in bed and try to solve problems until I at some incoherent point switch off. But, even then I feel like I’m too aware. Like I’m not totally asleep. I’m still somewhat alert.

My goal is to work on this need to be alert. This need to find resolve. Maybe this is what you need to?

All I know is that I’m not alone. I know that 6 hours or less is NOT enough for my body and mind. I am so ready to recondition myself. I am ready for a sleep revolution.

What about you?

Yours in the dreamscape,

Cozett

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The Energy Of Obligation: First Vacation In 11 years

I just got home from Perdido Key, FL in the US. It was only 4 nights but it’s the first real vacation I’ve had since 2012.

I am…home. But. I experience myself as a citizen of Earth. So, I am here….but will always be….there….and there…and over there as well….

Being in my apartment in Hixson…isn’t my dwelling time. It is a pause to rest then plot my next course. Which could be Thailand, India, Europe, Florida…who knows. All I know….is my soul is nomadic.

My sweet little mamaw told me the other day, “I’m so surprised. Shocked really. You never grew up traveling. We never did any traveling. It seems odd. But, I’m happy for you. I just want you to be safe. You’re braver than I am. Just be careful.”

There are few things in my life that…facilitate….me being able to fully feel any experience other than suffering.

One of those things is travel. It’s the only time I am fully happy. And, because this trip was the first vacation I’ve had since 2012 that I haven’t had to work and respond to calls, emails, texts, and more, I was able to finally release my phone without giving into fear of “letting someone down because I’m not immediately available to them.”

I’ve lived an on-call lifestyle 7 days per week since 2012. Sit with that. It’s emotionally devastating.

The energy of obligation even if you’re not fielding a bunch of calls….still depletes your energy stores, your joy isn’t full, your happiness is laced with dread, and some of my trips were absolutely ruined by customers or clients who chewed me out during vacation.

Sit with that. That’s freakin hard. A single woman who doesn’t have a college education. Who has multiple health issues that won’t allow for a 40 hour per week clock job without getting fired due to chronic conditions. Yet, not sick enough to qualify for any assistance.

The entirety of my life before 44 years old has been quite unkind.

I deserve the next 44 (plus) to make up for every tear I’ve cried, for every panic attack I’ve spiraled out of control, for every ER visit, for every expensive therapy session (that I really couldn’t afford).

I deserve the rest of my time here to make up for every man who has cheated on me, lied to me, compared me to other women, talked down to me, bet against me, body shamed me, mentally and verbally abused me, and abandoned me.

We are more than a social media feed. There are definitive reasons behind the decisions people like me make that do not make sense to, or offend others.

And, for those shortsighted or selfish enough to not think through the possible reasons I am (or you are) not meeting their needs…then maybe they deserve the discomfort of the decision I (or you) made. Maybe my lack of presence (or yours) will be the catalyst they need….to awaken. To understand that just because they are a: client, customer, family member, friend, etc. That their role in your life, whether it be personal or professionally based….does not preclude you from being autonomous….WITHOUT REPERCUSSION.

Because, let’s face it. When someone “punishes” you or myself by taking away their business, or freezing you out of the family or a friendship….that is in a nutshell….manipulation. An intentional willingness that gets off on causing those with less leverage in this life….to suffer.

More on this some other time. But, I’ve said all of that to say this…personal power is a right. And just because you enjoying your autonomy makes someone uncomfortable or feel some kind of way…is no sign that you have to betray yourself in an effort to keep them approving of you.

So much more is coming. Stay tuned.

Cozett Contemplates

#cozettcontemplates #thecatalystpodcast #autonomy #personalpower #relationshiprevolution #travel #travelblogger #traveltheroad #thejourney #lifepath #perdidokey #perdidokeyflorida #pensacola #sunset

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Cozett Contemplates: The Energy Of Opportunity

Cozett Contemplates the energy of opportunity

What do you think of when you hear the word, “opportunity”?

Opportunity has to do with potential. And, potential has to do with pre-manifestation frequencies.

Whether you realize it or not you and everyone in your life is consistently manifesting something. We are all manifesting connections, people, situations, relationships…and opportunities.

Depending on whether you are in alignment with your soul’s calling you may or may not be manifesting opportunities that lead you one step CLOSER to the highest version of yourself. The richer version of you. The healthier and happier version of you. The more at peace version of yourself.

This is where logic tripped me up. For nearly all of my life I consistently put my heart on the back burner and followed logic alone. I believed that my heart was “wishy-washy” and couldn’t be trusted. That is what I was taught. Now I see what a horrifying travesty that teaching is. It is an actual and literal betrayal of your soul. If you’re a Christian…that soul is one that Jesus died to redeem. For many years I heard it preached that “the heart is deceptive.” Yes, there is a bible verse that says this…but because Jesus came to show us a better way….I will not reference it. I won’t reference it because I’d rather you focus on the work of Jesus than the condemnation of old testament theology.

My struggle for years was, “if Jesus gave me a new heart then why am I not allowed to trust it? Would he create something brand new in me if it were not of quality workmanship? Given to me in such seriousness so as to be willing to DIE and be executed and misunderstood for my new heart only for HIS preachers to keep preaching that it’s ugly, sinful, untrustworthy, and fickle?”

No, my friends. This is not the way. There is a better way. And that way is the way of your heart. Because of this kind of stuff I no longer identify as fundamental or conservative. And because of this detachment to brute thinking I have healed and become more vibrant than I have ever been at any point in my life thus far. So, now that I have addressed the religious perspective I’m going to move on to a point that is more comprehensive and inclusive. I write so that I can “feel with” atheists, religious folks, spiritual folks, and everyone in between. Why? Because….I am everyone in between. I’ll save that concept for another post! ha ha

EVERY opportunity that will ever come your way carries its own unique energetic signature. And it is that frequency, that signature that you should learn to pay attention to rather than just the “trappings” that the opportunity comes dressed in. There is ALWAYS more than meets the eye. That applies to people, places and things.

Here’s what I mean. Over the course of my adult life I’ve owned and operated multiple businesses at once. I am multi-passionate. And because of that I call myself a “multipreneur.” I have learned some great lessons from being this kind of business owner that I want to pass on to you because I want you to have the ability to read the energy of the opportunities that come your way so you can identify which ones to seize and which ones to pass on. This is so important when it comes to coming into alignment with your dreams. Your callings.

Lesson #1- If you reject opportunities that appeal to your heart but not your mind and are consistently led by logic you are sending a message out into the atmosphere that you would “rather betray your heart and not listen to your conscience and that following what you “should” do is more important than following what you “know” to do.” Essentially you are opening yourself to more opportunities to betray yourself and your emotions and your purpose. Sit with that. Is that ok with you?

Lesson #2- The head is more deceptive than the heart could ever be. Our heads are filled on a daily basis with what? Social media images that tell us our bodies aren’t good enough, our beauty isn’t vibrant enough, our favorite politicians are taking a beating, our religions are so persecuted, our vehicles aren’t nice enough, and so we become programmed. Our minds become programmed. Not our hearts. Our hearts hold an eternal knowing that cannot be diminished or layered over enough so as to cover up the truth of our calling, our paths, our purpose. Unless of course we refuse this knowing. Then it will lie dormant and any potential you would have otherwise had is for nothing because you spent your life following a programmed mind rather than the innocent and pure knowing of your heart.

Lesson #3- Saying yes to our heads and no to our hearts sends the message that our heart’s desires are of no value and so we keep receiving opportunities that lead us away from our soul’s calling.

For many years I turned down the volume on the voice of my heart. I focused on work that seemed to be, “the only logically good decision.” The decision that I knew my family would prefer I make. The decision that logically looked like it would bring in more money. Logic deals with surface things. Not deep things. If you want to live a life that is shallow, by all means, go for the surface stuff. But, if you want a life that is cultivated, richly deep and satisfying…the only way is the way of your heart.

By following logic and betraying my heart I was out of alignment with my life’s purpose. My physical and mental health suffered greatly. At almost 44 years of age I am just now recovering from the health disasters of following a logic-based lifestyle. I DO NOT want you to make the same mistake.

Because of the pain that FORCED me out of my firmly held place in logic I had no choice but to turn and “try out the desires of my heart.” I began to “FEEL” the opportunities rather than assess them based on logic alone. I would sit with an opportunity that logically didn’t make sense but that emotionally lined up with my passions. For me those things have been travel (Sovereign Travel by Cozett, http://cozettdunn.inteletravel.com healthier living (Sovereign Beauty http://www.crunchi.com/cozettdunn, and writing (Cozett Contemplates https://www.facebook.com/chatttownpoet. Who makes money doing those things?? Answer: the person who is passionate about them!! This girl!!

2023 for me is, “the year of the yes.” I will say yes to my heart more this year than I have in all the other years of my life combined. Can you imagine the adventure in that?? That is wild!! It’s gonna feel good and I am going to feel good! This is my intention. This is my path. And, I hope that as you’ve read this heart-centered post that it has created a courage in you that perhaps you never believed you could have. I hope when this messages finds you that it is YOUR catalyst to living the life of your dreams. I hope that it will be the springboard into a life that is healthier, wealthier, and more satisfying than you could have imagined you could have and definitely more than what you’ve experienced up to this point in your journey.

I hope this year will be “the year of the yes” for your heart and that all your WILDEST dreams come true.

I love you. I really do.

Cozett Dunn

#cozettcontemplates#yourbestlifenow#DontMakeThisMistake#followyourheart#energeticshift#opportunity#morethanmeetstheeye

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